The Music Of Marriage

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Imagine waking up every morning next to your spouse, but instead of a kiss goodmorning, you immediately begin sparring over who will control the day’s agenda. Elbow jabs replace tender embraces. Harsh commands drown out affectionate words. Does this sound like the marriage you always dreamed of? Probably not. Yet for many couples, marriage feels more like a never-ending MMA fight than a duet of harmony and love.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. God’s design for marriage is less like a battle for dominance and more like composing a beautiful song together. The melody comes from Jesus, and each spouse contributes a complementary harmony. What if you could wake up tomorrow with a new vision for your marriage – one of mutual sacrifice, support, and a shared mission to let the gospel shape your lives? This melody is available, but it takes practice, patience, and an endless focus on the Lord who defines love itself.

  1. Marriage should be like making music together, not like an MMA fight. The spouses should focus on complementing each other and making a harmonious whole, not trying to dominate or control each other.
  2. Wives are called to submit to their husbands, but this does not mean they are inferior or should be obedient in all things. It means they should have a heart disposition of supporting and esteeming their husbands.
  3. Husbands are called to love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church. This means cherishing them, considering their interests, and not being harsh with words or actions.
  4. Both spouses need to focus on Jesus, who is the ultimate melody line. If one spouse is “singing off key,” the other spouse can still aim to make beautiful harmony by focusing on Jesus.
  5. Learning to make harmony in marriage is a skill that takes practice. Repetition, listening to the “melody,” and listening to the other “harmony parts” are key parts of improving.

Harmony takes work. There will be days when the chords clash and notes falter. But don’t lose heart. With Christ as your melody line, you can drown out the dissonance of selfishness and pride. Listen to Him. Cherish your spouse. And keep practicing this song of mutual love and sacrifice God has composed for your marriage. No matter what struggles you face, remember that the most beautiful harmonies emerge from a shared desire to lift up the melody and honor the Composer. May your marriage be a song that rises to the heavens, glorifying God through a unity only He could orchestrate. Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, and let the music play on.


Colossians 3:18-19

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